Thursday, September 21, 2006

Nightmare of nightmares

Ok, third post today, woo! Be sure to read the other two. They're so good they've got comments! Both of them!

Back to the nightmare:

(Skip the section in brackets if you are either (a) familiar with the history of my nightmare fund, or (b) if you are Adina.)


[We got a new fund. My Senior Manager said he'd handle everything and train people. He didn't, then he quit.

I, somehow, got stuck with the fund. Me, the guy who doesn't know how to do anything (true. not hyperbole, actual truth.) My lazy manager did not review/check-in/email me to help train/note my (lack of) progress/as a resource.

Not knowing how to do anything, I did nothing.

Initial report deadline sailed past.

Lazy manager then came over and took the fund off my desk. It is a big ugly umbrella fund. He left me a small piece of it.

Lazy manager moaned and groaned and finished the reporting two weeks late. I'm glad someone knows how to do it, even late.
]

The lazy manager sent two copies of the reporting yesterday, one to the legal team to be reviewed, and one to the client. Please note he CCed me on none of the emails.

He took today (Thursday) and tomorrow (Friday) off.

This morning I got this series of email:

From: Legaldept@Tomscompany.com
To: Client

Good afternoon,

Please approve the attached the Fund for August 2006 Monthly statements. Once approved I will forward to the investors. Thank you very much.

-Legal team representative





From:Client
To:Legal team

Hi Legal team rep,

The year-to-date returns on all of the statements do not match the linked returns spreadsheet that your Manager prepared. Can you please confirm that you have the correct information? Otherwise the statements appear correct and in order.

Thank you,

-Client




From:Legal
To:LazyManager

Hi Manager,

Please confirm the YTD returns. The YTD returns on the file you sent to us match the statements. Did you send the client different numbers? Please confirm. Thanks.

-Legal




...



From:Legal
To:Tom (me) and Vice President of the Division

Hi VP or Tom,

Please look into this issue. Your Lazy Manager is apparently not in the office. We have checked the year to date returns based on the file he provided to Legal. The client has different figures (see email thread).

Thanks
-Legal




WTF?!

My Lazy-ass Manager not only takes the fund after the deadline has passed, fails to include me, the primary (albeit unwitting) contact on the fund, but sends different figures to the client and legal, AND THEN SKIPS OUT FOR A FOUR DAY WEEKEND.

Leaving me, and the VICE-FUCKING-PRESIDENT holding the bag.

So who's fault is it when I can't answer any questions the VP has? Is it my fault for NEVER GETTING TRAINED TO DO THE JOB THEY HIRED ME FOR!? IS IT?


GARARHGH!
-t

2 comments:

mance01 said...

Remember how we were talking about hypertension? This job is probably giving it to you.

I wonder how much money you could make juggling in the street.

Miss Lindsay Mak said...

...dude, is that a piece of ceiling that just fell on your head? I think it might be....