I blame Dick

Ok, there are two people in this story and I'm going to use pseudonyms. The guy is Dick. The girl is Sarah.

I hate, and love, the summer. This came to me earlier tonight, on the ride home graciously offered to me by two friends who shall remain nameless (because there are only two people in this story). It's the summer months. It's also during those weeks that formerly comprised Christmas break. Also, it happens sometimes just randomly during the year. You know what I'm talking about: lovestruck. Damn the romantic in me.

This really sucks when there is no object of affection. Then it turns into depressing, bitter (sometimes), lonliness. But not this time, this time, there is an object of my affection, and her name is Sarah.

But see, as it is always the case, Sarah has no idea, and no interest in being the object of my affection, she has no interest in affecting me in any way. As is always the case.

I blame Dick. It's his fault. Not the romantic waxing of my conscious mind, that's my fault. It's his fault that Sarah's involved.

For a while I sort of liked Sarah, thought she was pretty cool, but nothing happened. She moved on, found a guy, dated the guy, years passed. I also dated some girls. One... liked the company of other men a little too much, one was short, one was psycho, one was pretty cool but hated me because I was a jerk.

Anyway. I find myself again, unattached. I see Dick a little while ago. Dick mentions Sarah once had a thing for me. Dick tells me he's spoken to Sarah, and that she liked me, once, back in the day. This is at the time that I thought she was pretty cool. And Dick knew both of these things. And he did not inform either party (Sarah or myself). Days pass. Dick mentions he saw Sarah yesterday, told her about that time that she and I liked each other but didn't know it, but he knew it and didnt' say anything then, but he is now. And then Dick tells me that Sarah said right now, she would think about liking me again, if not for this guy she just met and thinks she likes. Because she's been out on a few dates with him. But if not for him, then she'd be giving me a look.

Honestly. You know Dick, if you'd mentioned this mutual attraction two years ago Sarah and I may already have had a go at it, and found out how it ends... But no, now she's dating some guy, I'm caught up in the summer fever, and she has no idea. Unless, Dick, you've already told her. But whatever. The point of the story isn't that I like a girl.

The point of the story is that I like liking girls. I like the emotional rollercoaster that runs my brain. It's a good time. I feel, therefore I am.

Anyway, it's Dick's fault. Stupid Dick.

-t

This sort of feeling is why I say things like "if you have a secret crush on me, today is a good day to tell me." word.