Ok, so I never do any work at work. Except the first week of each month when budgets are due. The only other thing that I would be working on is archiving the stupid funds. But, I can't do that until my ID for the online archiving system comes through, and it hasn't, so I'm off the hook for that.
We have a group next to us, they're some sort of Cash group, they reconcile bad trades, it's what they do. Cute girl's group. Jonathan(the opie&anthony fan)'s group. Here's the thing. I think their manager likes the same girl I like. The really pretty one. The one by the printers. This is causing me to feel more anxious than I normally do. And normally, around her, I feel anxious.
It's not her fault. It's not like I'd go up to her and say "You make me nervous when I'm around you." Because that's not true. She doesn't make me nervous. I'm nervous on my own. To be accurate I would have to say "I'm nervous around you." That way I avoid mentioning the cause of my nervousness, which is, I believe, a feeling of inferiority. I'm not as attractive as she is, as well dressed as she is, as knowledgeble, as smart, as cool, etc etc etc etc.
None of this helps me. I find it difficult to be myself here at work. I find it especially difficult to be myself around her at work. I believe that is maybe the greatest hinderance to actually making it to dinner with her. Were I myself I'm sure I'd be charming and clever, she would warm up to the idea of a dinner engagement, and we'd be set. Not myself I'm sulky, quiet, reserved, shy, passive, and all other bad ways to be if you want the girl to like you. Plus this stupid manager over at her cube chatting all the time and reeking of Old Spice. Stupid other manager.
My only hope is that we (the girl and I, not the manager an I) get trapped in an elevator together for hours, then I can just relax and be myself. And after that if she doesn't want to go out, that's fine. But then it'll be because she didn't like me, not because she didin't like the me I was around her at work. Trapped in an elevator....
We work on the first floor.
-Tom
recommended downloads:
AC/DC, Thunderstruck, TNT
Oasis, She's Electric, Helter Skelter, and Force of Nature
Bowling for Soup, On and On (About You)
6 comments:
that was a wonderful and poignant post. i would say more but i work at work.
~ adina
I'm dealing with my quarter-life crisis by reliving my adolescence through post-grunge mid 90's pop/rock. Oasis, Matchbox 20, Third Eye Blind, Goo Goo Dolls, and (God help me) Hootie and the Blowfish.
Those are my recommended downloads,
Felecia
those are bands. those are not recommended downloads.
and speaking of downloads, try and find a celebrity jeopardy episode. man I love those.
-T
I bet that if the ceiling collapsed at your office and you rescued her from a falling pipe, she'd go to dinner with you.
This is only funny to me because our ceiling did collapse, along with a few walls and some pipes. But just in one section, so I'm still stuck at work. Blast.
PARDON ME.
Only Lonely - Hootie and the Blowfish
Oasis - Wonderwall
Matchbox 20 - Push (Acoustic)
Third Eye Blind - I Want You
now I'm confused, is Only Lonely the artist or the song? I thought Hootie and the Blowfish was the artist, did you flip them? whats going on? you see, this is why I don't recommend letting other people recommend downloads (;)
-Tom
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