I almost posted today. (thoughts on the future growth of professional lacrosse and the challenges the sport faces in attracting a national audience (especially a television audience)(which are very similar, I feel, to the challenges soccer faces here in the US))
But, I felt the post deserved more research, and possibly an editor, or at least a rewrite. And so I scrapped it.
I just thought you all should know.
(the field is too big! one camera shot can't encompass routine plays without zooming out to God perspective (ie, everyone looks like ants!) and losing the ball)
(hockey is the nearest successful comparison, it works because the rink is much smaller than a lacrosse field, limiting the distance a camera needs to pan/zoom to keep up, and the black puck (mostly) stays on the white ice surface, a contrast that makes following its high-speed trajectory much easier for the viewer)
(football also takes place on a huge field, but most of the action is restricted to a stripe of field about ten yards wide (that's less than 1/10 of the whole field the camera needs to focus on. the exceptions are (a) long passes and run plays that break for big yards (easy to solve with one camera on the QB, and one wide shot for the ball-in-the-air; and a RB is nowhere near as fast as a lacrosse ball in flight (AND he is always at ground level!) and (b) kickoff/field goal/punt return plays which can all be covered with one camera at the end of the field)
(I'm getting a lot of clarity here...enough that I now realize I'm going to need a scatter plot in three dimensions to make this abundantly clear... stay tuned)
-t
Showing posts with label sports. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sports. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Eire: A Quick Recap
I started typing a list. This is by no means complete. Also, there are pictures. Lots and lots and lots of pictures.
Thanks a million.
-t
- Everything was green. As green as the postcards, posters, pictures, brochures, stories, videos, and eye-witness accounts attest; That green.
- It does rain sometimes, just not on me. The climate seems to be what I would expect Seattle to be like: overcast, ocassionally drizzly, and cool.
- Also, there are cattle and sheep everywhere. Everywhere.
- I think it's a shame newer, bigger roadways are being constructed across the country. You don't need new roads. You can walk it.
- I hate American tourists. I have hated American tourists since my first trip abroad, and they have not grown any less loathsome as I have matured.
- Everyone in Ireland knows someone in Boston, or has lived in Boston.
- High Tea at the Shelbourne was awesome.
- All the Irish people we met were very nice. Most had awesome accents.
- Dublin is tiny. Tiny like Boston is tiny. Tiny like, I could walk across it in ten minutes.
- Most tourists go to Ireland to track down relatives/ancestry/genealogical records. Irish comedians amuse themsevelves by misdirecting these people to other parts of the island.
- The number of Dunkin Donuts in Boston is fewer than the number of castle ruins in Shannon, which is fewer than the number of tanning salons and "adult" toy shops on any given street in Dublin.
- Guiness is cheaper than Carlsberg in Ireland. This is something that should have been obvious to me before I saw the bill.
- Guiness is owned by a mulitnational beverage conglomerate, not based in Ireland. Guiness is still delicious, though.
- Entirely too many Irish folks drink Budweiser, Bud Light, and, [blech] Coors Light.
- Sweaters of Irish wool are exceptionally warm.
- The Liffey was pretty. Don't touch it.
- Public transportation is significantly cleaner, and more punctual, than the MBTA.
- The US dollar is weak!
- Hurling is awesome. And easier to explain than cricket. Which still makes more sense than Australian football.
Thanks a million.
-t
Wednesday, August 05, 2009
Ghost Outs (Not Scary)
Last night our opponents tried to issue a two-out intentional walk to the spot in our lineup before a ghost out. (ghost out: when playing with less than three female players the team will be charged an out after the last batter in the line-up in place of the missing player)
This is a bush league thing to try.
Turns out, though, strategic as it may be, it's against the rules of the league (no walk shall be issued to the batter prior to a ghost out) which we didn't know, so after the first pitch went 20 feet over his head, our guy actually jumped across the plate to hit the next pitch which was four feet outside. (grounder to third for the last out)
(Which ended the inning and meant the next inning started with the ghost out.)
But, turns out, when they tried intentionally walking him, they knew the rule about no intentional walks, and were banking on us not knowing it.
Which we didn't
Which prompted our guy to swing at an unhittable pitch
Double bush league. Bush and deceitful. These guys are assholes.
Also, the umpire didn't explain the rule until after the at bat. That I don't understand at all.
Anyway. After the intentional ghost out walk situation played out we were going into the bottom of the last inning down one run.
Ground out
Single
Fly out, no advance
Walk
Single - scored runner from second, runner from first went to third on the throw to the plate, batter took second on throw to the plate
Tie game!
Next batter, walk-off ground-rule double
We win! Suck it bush leaguers!
Woo!
Also, I was informed today that I had enough ABs to qualify for the batting title.
Which I won. I also led the team in OBP. This marks a significant improvement from my first season (and a significant improvement from my broken collarbone)
And now, depending on the outcome of another game, we may have qualified for the playoffs.
-t
This is a bush league thing to try.
Turns out, though, strategic as it may be, it's against the rules of the league (no walk shall be issued to the batter prior to a ghost out) which we didn't know, so after the first pitch went 20 feet over his head, our guy actually jumped across the plate to hit the next pitch which was four feet outside. (grounder to third for the last out)
(Which ended the inning and meant the next inning started with the ghost out.)
But, turns out, when they tried intentionally walking him, they knew the rule about no intentional walks, and were banking on us not knowing it.
Which we didn't
Which prompted our guy to swing at an unhittable pitch
Double bush league. Bush and deceitful. These guys are assholes.
Also, the umpire didn't explain the rule until after the at bat. That I don't understand at all.
Anyway. After the intentional ghost out walk situation played out we were going into the bottom of the last inning down one run.
Ground out
Single
Fly out, no advance
Walk
Single - scored runner from second, runner from first went to third on the throw to the plate, batter took second on throw to the plate
Tie game!
Next batter, walk-off ground-rule double
We win! Suck it bush leaguers!
Woo!
Also, I was informed today that I had enough ABs to qualify for the batting title.
Which I won. I also led the team in OBP. This marks a significant improvement from my first season (and a significant improvement from my broken collarbone)
And now, depending on the outcome of another game, we may have qualified for the playoffs.
-t
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Walk Before you Run (Away From Angry Bat-Wielding Opponents)
Last Tuesday I got the ok for sporting activities from my orthopedist. The collarbone has healed a full 100%.
Luckily, I received the news in time to play in that night's softball game, and would have, but didn't, because it was rained out. (You remember the rain, right? The thirty-three weeks of rain? I blame global warming)
So I had a week to prepare for the next game on the schedule and spent it rebuilding the atrophied muscle tissue and reflexes by playing wiffleball.
The rehad program worked out pretty well. I was two-for-two in last night's game, hitting a single and a double. As I slid, hard, into second base on that double, I was planning on a triple and a home run in my next two at bats to complete the cylce - but didn't get a chance to have two more at bats.
I know, I know, it was going hard into second base that got me the broken collarbone in the first place six (seven?) weeks ago. You're all rolling your eyes at the computer screen now, "Tom, you moron, you broke your other collarbone (or ankle, wrist, etc)?"
Well, no, I wasn't hurt sliding into second base. The game ended prematurely by the slaughter rule. We lost.
We lost because the other team was populated by tools. No one on their team swung the bat. Every single "hitter" went up to the plate looking for a walk. And the umpire was happy to give it to them.
In a typical softball game, when you step up to the plate, you SWING THE BAT and, in a typical softball game, if you're not swinging, the umpire will drastically expand the strike zone to entice you to start swinging.
This umpire did not do that. Which suited this D-league, Co-ed Softball team just fine. Billy Beane would have been proud. Except he wouldn't, because IT'S SOFTBALL! HIT THE GD PITCH, ALREADY.
These guys would take five and six straight pitches. They would only swing with two called strikes on them, prefectly happy to take a walk. It was shameful.
Also, because this is D-league Co-ed softball there are stupid girl rules, in particular this one:
"10.1 The league will adhere to the ASA rule regarding walking a male batter when a female batter is on deck. When a male batter is walked with a female batter on deck, the male batter will be awarded second base." List ofstupid Rules
I'd like to scan in the scorecard from the game so you could see exactly how many walks were issued, but I won't, because it will upset me.
I will point out that twice, TWICE, during the game their clean-up hitter, CLEAN-UP HITTER chose to walk because he was followed by a female in the batting order.
THEIR FOUR HITTER WILLINGLY TOOK A TWO-BASE WALK TWICE.
And this is after their team was up by 8 or nine runs. SWING THE FREAKING BAT!
Our entire team was beside themselves. Outfielders were falling asleep. The shortened, five-inning game featured 9 walks.
NINE!
Our team, in an entire season last year, received two (2) walks. Both intentional, both because the opposing team chose not to pitch to our slugger with first base open.
Also, it would have been three intentional walks on the season, except once our guy Mike chose to swing at one of the intentional balls, and he hit it for a double. WHICH IS HOW YOUR ARE SUPPOSED TO PLAY SOFTBALL.
I drew up some new rules for the league. I am emailing them to the league president. I do not expect a reply.
Any other changes you'd can think of?
-t
Luckily, I received the news in time to play in that night's softball game, and would have, but didn't, because it was rained out. (You remember the rain, right? The thirty-three weeks of rain? I blame global warming)
So I had a week to prepare for the next game on the schedule and spent it rebuilding the atrophied muscle tissue and reflexes by playing wiffleball.
The rehad program worked out pretty well. I was two-for-two in last night's game, hitting a single and a double. As I slid, hard, into second base on that double, I was planning on a triple and a home run in my next two at bats to complete the cylce - but didn't get a chance to have two more at bats.
I know, I know, it was going hard into second base that got me the broken collarbone in the first place six (seven?) weeks ago. You're all rolling your eyes at the computer screen now, "Tom, you moron, you broke your other collarbone (or ankle, wrist, etc)?"
Well, no, I wasn't hurt sliding into second base. The game ended prematurely by the slaughter rule. We lost.
We lost because the other team was populated by tools. No one on their team swung the bat. Every single "hitter" went up to the plate looking for a walk. And the umpire was happy to give it to them.
In a typical softball game, when you step up to the plate, you SWING THE BAT and, in a typical softball game, if you're not swinging, the umpire will drastically expand the strike zone to entice you to start swinging.
This umpire did not do that. Which suited this D-league, Co-ed Softball team just fine. Billy Beane would have been proud. Except he wouldn't, because IT'S SOFTBALL! HIT THE GD PITCH, ALREADY.
These guys would take five and six straight pitches. They would only swing with two called strikes on them, prefectly happy to take a walk. It was shameful.
Also, because this is D-league Co-ed softball there are stupid girl rules, in particular this one:
"10.1 The league will adhere to the ASA rule regarding walking a male batter when a female batter is on deck. When a male batter is walked with a female batter on deck, the male batter will be awarded second base." List of
I'd like to scan in the scorecard from the game so you could see exactly how many walks were issued, but I won't, because it will upset me.
I will point out that twice, TWICE, during the game their clean-up hitter, CLEAN-UP HITTER chose to walk because he was followed by a female in the batting order.
THEIR FOUR HITTER WILLINGLY TOOK A TWO-BASE WALK TWICE.
And this is after their team was up by 8 or nine runs. SWING THE FREAKING BAT!
Our entire team was beside themselves. Outfielders were falling asleep. The shortened, five-inning game featured 9 walks.
NINE!
Our team, in an entire season last year, received two (2) walks. Both intentional, both because the opposing team chose not to pitch to our slugger with first base open.
Also, it would have been three intentional walks on the season, except once our guy Mike chose to swing at one of the intentional balls, and he hit it for a double. WHICH IS HOW YOUR ARE SUPPOSED TO PLAY SOFTBALL.
I drew up some new rules for the league. I am emailing them to the league president. I do not expect a reply.
Proposal of Boston West Co-ed rule changes, regarding walks:
(1) Base on Balls will be abolished
(2) Only Intentional Base on Balls will be allowed. The pitcher's intent to walk the batter must be announced by the pitcher and acknowledged by the umpire before the first pitch of the at-bat is thrown. A maximum of ONE Intentional Base on Balls will be allowed per team, per game.
(3) Any player issued an Intentional Base on Balls, if he or she is batting before a female player, shall be awarded two bases (as the current BB rule is written)
(4) A strike will be called on any batter who takes three consecutive pitches (except for an IBB)
(5) The batting team may request a new pitcher if the current pitcher throws more than 10 consecutive pitches that are outside the called strike zone.
Also up for consideration:
-Heckling an umpire who refuses to expand the strike zone after a team has demonstrated a willingness to reach base via walk will be encouraged.
-There will be no penalty for a pitcher who plunks any batter who refuses to swing the bat.
-Any batter who is too picky will be called out after six pitches (called balls or strikes)...unless there are two outs.
Any other changes you'd can think of?
-t
Friday, May 15, 2009
Softball & Injury Update
Sorry for the delay, I've been typing since Wednesday morning, left-handed, because my right arm is out of commission.
The game started off strong. we were smoking the other team (who couldn't hit at all) and I'd made a few good stops in the field (and one put out on a kid going second to third which turned a routine 6-3 ground ball into a 6-3-5 DP. Bad base running).
Anyway in my first at bat I tried stretching a single into a double after a bobble in the outfield, git beat to the bag by the throw (a good three feet), and tried jumping over the tag, which, if it had worked would have put me in short center field, where I would have been out anyway, but I never made it, because their shortstop, an ogre of a kid swung the tag around at hip-height, taking out both my legs, up-ending me in the process, and sending me, shoulder-first, into the hard-as-concrete-painted-like-dirt infield.
I lost my glasses, and couldn't move my right arm. Took one pitch the next inning at first base (soft liner, right to me), then walked off the field, unable to throw, or hold a bat, or even lift my right arm.
I drove myself back, fearing a dislocated shoulder (not the injury as much as the repair), and went to the hospital.
x-rays revealed a distal clavicular fracture. No sports activities for 4-6 weeks. arm in a sling for at least two.
Hence, the left-handed typing.
-t
The game started off strong. we were smoking the other team (who couldn't hit at all) and I'd made a few good stops in the field (and one put out on a kid going second to third which turned a routine 6-3 ground ball into a 6-3-5 DP. Bad base running).
Anyway in my first at bat I tried stretching a single into a double after a bobble in the outfield, git beat to the bag by the throw (a good three feet), and tried jumping over the tag, which, if it had worked would have put me in short center field, where I would have been out anyway, but I never made it, because their shortstop, an ogre of a kid swung the tag around at hip-height, taking out both my legs, up-ending me in the process, and sending me, shoulder-first, into the hard-as-concrete-painted-like-dirt infield.
I lost my glasses, and couldn't move my right arm. Took one pitch the next inning at first base (soft liner, right to me), then walked off the field, unable to throw, or hold a bat, or even lift my right arm.
I drove myself back, fearing a dislocated shoulder (not the injury as much as the repair), and went to the hospital.
x-rays revealed a distal clavicular fracture. No sports activities for 4-6 weeks. arm in a sling for at least two.
Hence, the left-handed typing.
-t
Friday, May 01, 2009
Back-of-the-Napkin
A quick back of the napkin calculation (arrived after researching Half & Half varieties, and seeing the Jesus Shuttlesworth variant)
Ray Allen trails Reggie Miller by just over 260 three-pointers for the all time NBA record.
Ray Allen nets almost 40% of the threes he takes (career 0.398).
Which means, to make 260 three-pointers he needs to attempt 650.
Ray Allen averages 6.1 3-pt attempts per game, which means
He'll need to play 108 more games to break Reggie Miller's all time three-point scoring record.
(assuming, of course 3PA, 3P%, etc remain the same).
Allen has averaged 62 games per season over his career, though three seasons were shortened significantly by injury. I expect 70-75 games is closer to normal, and with that assumption, Ray needs to play one and one-half seasons to hold the record free and clear.
Which is half a season longer than his contract with the Celtics. Here's hoping he can stick around.
-t
(stats from basketball-reference
Ray Allen trails Reggie Miller by just over 260 three-pointers for the all time NBA record.
Ray Allen nets almost 40% of the threes he takes (career 0.398).
Which means, to make 260 three-pointers he needs to attempt 650.
Ray Allen averages 6.1 3-pt attempts per game, which means
He'll need to play 108 more games to break Reggie Miller's all time three-point scoring record.
(assuming, of course 3PA, 3P%, etc remain the same).
Allen has averaged 62 games per season over his career, though three seasons were shortened significantly by injury. I expect 70-75 games is closer to normal, and with that assumption, Ray needs to play one and one-half seasons to hold the record free and clear.
Which is half a season longer than his contract with the Celtics. Here's hoping he can stick around.
-t
(stats from basketball-reference
Thursday, April 30, 2009
The Red Team
First softball game of the season has come and gone. Good news: we won!
We took the lead in the top of the first inning and held it the entire game, winning by a final score of 19-11.
Your author flied out to right field in the first at bat (not knowing his own strenghth, he was just trying to pop one over the first baseman, and instead hit it 200 feet right at their right fielder), then, determined to get on base in the second plate appearance waited for a really good pitch to hit, didn't get one, and walked on five pitches. In the last at bat with runners on first and second he grounded into a fielder's choice (5U, safe at first).
In the field, though, the spectacular defensive prowess was unchanged, save for a fast groundball between first and second that your author didn't even make an attempt at catching.
But, three good picks for force outs saved a few runs over the course of the game.
AVG: 0.000
OBP: 0.333
SLG: 0.000
OPS: 0.333
Hopefully I'll get my average up to...positive numbers, soon.
-t
We took the lead in the top of the first inning and held it the entire game, winning by a final score of 19-11.
Your author flied out to right field in the first at bat (not knowing his own strenghth, he was just trying to pop one over the first baseman, and instead hit it 200 feet right at their right fielder), then, determined to get on base in the second plate appearance waited for a really good pitch to hit, didn't get one, and walked on five pitches. In the last at bat with runners on first and second he grounded into a fielder's choice (5U, safe at first).
In the field, though, the spectacular defensive prowess was unchanged, save for a fast groundball between first and second that your author didn't even make an attempt at catching.
But, three good picks for force outs saved a few runs over the course of the game.
AVG: 0.000
OBP: 0.333
SLG: 0.000
OPS: 0.333
Hopefully I'll get my average up to...positive numbers, soon.
-t
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Firewalled Again!
I caught an early train this morning so I would have plenty of time before work to review the teams competing in the NCAA tournament and then submit my bracket on espn.com.
So, at 8:45AM I started filling in the regions, (staying away from upsets) (I've got 3 1-seeds and a 2-seed in the finals)) and was ready to submit by 9:00AM.
I clicked "submit" AND THE CONFIRMATION PAGE WAS BLOCKED!
Kudos, I guess, to the IT department, for stringing me along for the entire deliberatory process only to shove the firewall in my face when I tried to make it official.
I will not, therefore, be participating in the espn bracket challenge, but I'll try to keep updates posted somewhere online.
Also, while we're talking about a firewall, can anyone offer an explanation why myspace, and facebook are blocked under the "dating and personals" rule but craigslist personals are freely available?
I can't check out pictures from my nephew's 1st St. Patrick's day on facebook, but I can pull this up in a full-screen browser (nsfw (my whole point, obv).
Corporate America, where Brackets are off limits, but Boobs are ok.
-t
So, at 8:45AM I started filling in the regions, (staying away from upsets) (I've got 3 1-seeds and a 2-seed in the finals)) and was ready to submit by 9:00AM.
I clicked "submit" AND THE CONFIRMATION PAGE WAS BLOCKED!
Kudos, I guess, to the IT department, for stringing me along for the entire deliberatory process only to shove the firewall in my face when I tried to make it official.
I will not, therefore, be participating in the espn bracket challenge, but I'll try to keep updates posted somewhere online.
Also, while we're talking about a firewall, can anyone offer an explanation why myspace, and facebook are blocked under the "dating and personals" rule but craigslist personals are freely available?
I can't check out pictures from my nephew's 1st St. Patrick's day on facebook, but I can pull this up in a full-screen browser (nsfw (my whole point, obv).
Corporate America, where Brackets are off limits, but Boobs are ok.
-t
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
DeSean Jackson Is A Dope
I wanted to knock that depressing post off the top of the page. Instead, I'm substituting this post, which should only depress Philadelphia Eagles fans (or anyone who picked Donovan McNabb for their fantasy squad).
Last night McNabb hit Eagles receiver DeSean Jackson for a 40-yard TD, except Jackson started his celebration early, dropping the ball on the one yard line. By rule, the play ended before possession changed, the Eagles ran it in and got the seven points, but McNabb didn't get the credit for the touchdown, and Eagles fans are all smacking their heads in incredulity.
Unfortunately, the video isn't up yet, however, there is "this video showing a similar gaffe he made in the Army All-American bowl.
-t
Last night McNabb hit Eagles receiver DeSean Jackson for a 40-yard TD, except Jackson started his celebration early, dropping the ball on the one yard line. By rule, the play ended before possession changed, the Eagles ran it in and got the seven points, but McNabb didn't get the credit for the touchdown, and Eagles fans are all smacking their heads in incredulity.
Unfortunately, the video isn't up yet, however, there is "this video showing a similar gaffe he made in the Army All-American bowl.
-t
Thursday, September 04, 2008
It Takes Twice That Just To Get Me Out Of Bed In The Morning...
As those of you who are regular readers (probably in the billions by now, as I'm no longer firewalled in China) know, I occassionally write a bit about the Red Sox.
It's certainly no regular feature, but I am a fan of baseball, and Boston sports in general, and do take the opportunity, from time to time, to comment on the current sports scene.
Well, turns out, WEEI, a local Boston sports radio station, is looking for bloggers at the new weei.com to do just that. In fact, they have decided to hold a contest.
So let me tell you why I will not be participating:
(1) The required 500 word entry isn't long enough to encompass the typical blogger's ramblings (see joeposnanski.com)
(2) They get the rights to the winner's content, because the winner will be hired to blog for a year on weei.com
(3) and be paid $5,000.
$5,000? Five grand? That's barely pocket money!
And I know, I know, you're thinking "Hey, if I were a blogger who regularly commented on the Boston sports scene for free, why wouldn't I want to upgrade to a nice $5K paycheck?"
I'll tell you why: Because it's peanuts. You could hire Jerry Seinfeld to blog for maybe a week with that $5,000. And my Red Sox commentary is worth at least Seinfeld money.
Yes, I realize Seinfeld's a comedian, but most bloggers are (trying to be) comedians too! Funny sells! Funny does not sell out. Not for a measly five grand.
Hell, that's not even enough for a hood ornament on one of these bad boys.
Other bloggers are with me on the boycott of the contest (for different, more defeatist, reasons) at Sox and Dawgs
It's certainly no regular feature, but I am a fan of baseball, and Boston sports in general, and do take the opportunity, from time to time, to comment on the current sports scene.
Well, turns out, WEEI, a local Boston sports radio station, is looking for bloggers at the new weei.com to do just that. In fact, they have decided to hold a contest.
So let me tell you why I will not be participating:
(1) The required 500 word entry isn't long enough to encompass the typical blogger's ramblings (see joeposnanski.com)
(2) They get the rights to the winner's content, because the winner will be hired to blog for a year on weei.com
(3) and be paid $5,000.
$5,000? Five grand? That's barely pocket money!
And I know, I know, you're thinking "Hey, if I were a blogger who regularly commented on the Boston sports scene for free, why wouldn't I want to upgrade to a nice $5K paycheck?"
I'll tell you why: Because it's peanuts. You could hire Jerry Seinfeld to blog for maybe a week with that $5,000. And my Red Sox commentary is worth at least Seinfeld money.
Yes, I realize Seinfeld's a comedian, but most bloggers are (trying to be) comedians too! Funny sells! Funny does not sell out. Not for a measly five grand.
Hell, that's not even enough for a hood ornament on one of these bad boys.
Other bloggers are with me on the boycott of the contest (for different, more defeatist, reasons) at Sox and Dawgs
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Softball Wrap-Up
I believe Blogger dropped my last wrap-up post, apologies if you're reading this twice.
We lost our last game of the season (got smoked, actually), but overall were very encouraged by our improvement as a team.
I finished the season with a .625 batting average (up from .500 last year) and with three doubles and a triple, an OPS of 1.418.
I think, if the roster stays pretty much the same all we'd need to do to push us over the hump and into the playoffs is add one really good bat. I'm going to draft an email to Barry Bonds' agent - he's looking for something to do, right?
-t
We lost our last game of the season (got smoked, actually), but overall were very encouraged by our improvement as a team.
I finished the season with a .625 batting average (up from .500 last year) and with three doubles and a triple, an OPS of 1.418.
I think, if the roster stays pretty much the same all we'd need to do to push us over the hump and into the playoffs is add one really good bat. I'm going to draft an email to Barry Bonds' agent - he's looking for something to do, right?
-t
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
It's Raining (On) Surgeons
FJM is a site dedicated to poking fun, and sometimes lambasting, bad sports commentary and analysis, in print and television.
It's written by a group of baseball fans who also happen to be sitcom writers. You may know some of their work, like The Office.
If you are a baseball fan, you should read the site. If you are a journalism fan, you should read the site. If you are a comedy fan, you could do a lot worse.
Here is a small excerpt of their work:
In the same post there's a link to some great quotations on baseball.
-t
It's written by a group of baseball fans who also happen to be sitcom writers. You may know some of their work, like The Office.
If you are a baseball fan, you should read the site. If you are a journalism fan, you should read the site. If you are a comedy fan, you could do a lot worse.
Here is a small excerpt of their work:
Ask any football, soccer, rugby, or lacrosse player what they think about rain delays in baseball and they’ll likely give you an answer we can’t print here.
"Fuckshit!" they'll say, those foulmouthed lax players.
What they’ll imply is that baseball players are a little less manly than other athletes simply because they won’t play in the rain. What’s the worst that could happen?
The game will be impossible to play, and no one will watch it.
Slower pitching? More runs scored? A few extra scratches and bruises? (Boo-hoo.)
It's not a contact sport, dummy. It's a precision sport. You don't perform knee surgery in the rain either.
In the same post there's a link to some great quotations on baseball.
-t
7
Friday, May 09, 2008
Even Adina Can Appreciate This -or- A Good Reason To Watch NBA Playoff Coverage
This is one of the best studio teams ever assembled.
Stay classy, blogosphere.
-t
Stay classy, blogosphere.
-t
13
Monday, May 05, 2008
Strange Brew: Game 1
Played the first game of the season yesterday in the drizzly, swampy, Charlestown muck. Which I loved, because getting to Charlestown is hella more convinient than getting to Dedham for games. Next week we're in Brighton someplace, I think.
We played a good game, only lost by fifteen, in a full game (not shortened by themercy slaughter rule).
Personally, I went one-for-three with a double (generous scorekeeping by the team captain, really an infield hit with a throwing error), and knocked in a run on a fielders choice. So I'm hitting 0.333 and my OPS is a solid 1.000. Not a bad line for the first game of the season, and I didn't have to go to Arizona to work out all winter (though I should have, I could barely lift my arms after swinging the bat. Thank goodness I play first base, I never would have been able to throw across the diamond).
Speaking of fielding, the right side of our infield is as solid as ever, with our star shortstop making two dramatic double plays (both 6-3) and a few more terrific stops to save extra base hits. The right side of the infield is also as solid as ever (that is, not very solid at all through the second baseman - still having a little trouble catching ground balls...and pop-ups...line drives, relay throws, underhand tosses from the shortstop on double play balls...)
The rest of the team looks good. After a few more innings the outfielders will, no doubt, resume making the spectacular catches we remember from last season, and our pitchers will once again be lights-out (here, of course, I'm speaking of the spotlights used for night games, where their pitches are usually deposited by the opposing batters).
A good first game. Go green team! (we changed colors, green is the new blue).
-t
We played a good game, only lost by fifteen, in a full game (not shortened by the
Personally, I went one-for-three with a double (generous scorekeeping by the team captain, really an infield hit with a throwing error), and knocked in a run on a fielders choice. So I'm hitting 0.333 and my OPS is a solid 1.000. Not a bad line for the first game of the season, and I didn't have to go to Arizona to work out all winter (though I should have, I could barely lift my arms after swinging the bat. Thank goodness I play first base, I never would have been able to throw across the diamond).
Speaking of fielding, the right side of our infield is as solid as ever, with our star shortstop making two dramatic double plays (both 6-3) and a few more terrific stops to save extra base hits. The right side of the infield is also as solid as ever (that is, not very solid at all through the second baseman - still having a little trouble catching ground balls...and pop-ups...line drives, relay throws, underhand tosses from the shortstop on double play balls...)
The rest of the team looks good. After a few more innings the outfielders will, no doubt, resume making the spectacular catches we remember from last season, and our pitchers will once again be lights-out (here, of course, I'm speaking of the spotlights used for night games, where their pitches are usually deposited by the opposing batters).
A good first game. Go green team! (we changed colors, green is the new blue).
-t
16
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Craziest Thing I've Never Done (But It's On My List)
I took yesterday off - because it's Patriot's Day here in Massachusetts, and that's what you do: Take the day off, drink beer, and cheer for the marathon runners - or, if you're me, and crazy - wake up at 4AM, drive to Lexington, and watch the re-enactment of the Battle of Lexington and Concord.
Which is all well in its patriotly goodness, but, my abscence has convinced a few of the folks I work with that I was not, in fact, home watching the Red Sox beat the snot out of the Texas Rangers, but instead, was running, voluntarily, 26 miles through the streets of Greater Boston.
"Hey, Tom, did you run the marathon yesterday?"
What? No.
"You ran it, didn't you? That's why you were out?"
Do I look like I ran a marathon yesterday? Do I look like I could have run a marathon yesterday?
"How did you finish? What was your time? - I'm looking your name up online right now."
Ok, you won't find me. I didn't run.
"Come on, just tell me."
I'm not going to lie and say I ran it when I didn't.
"I would. You look like you could have run it. I'd say 'no' if you were like two-fifty, but you're not."
Dude, seriously, I didn't run the marathon.
So...anyobody know anyone who did run? I'm looking for an official number. I'll come in tomorrow and discreetly hang it up in my cubicle.
-t
Which is all well in its patriotly goodness, but, my abscence has convinced a few of the folks I work with that I was not, in fact, home watching the Red Sox beat the snot out of the Texas Rangers, but instead, was running, voluntarily, 26 miles through the streets of Greater Boston.
"Hey, Tom, did you run the marathon yesterday?"
What? No.
"You ran it, didn't you? That's why you were out?"
Do I look like I ran a marathon yesterday? Do I look like I could have run a marathon yesterday?
"How did you finish? What was your time? - I'm looking your name up online right now."
Ok, you won't find me. I didn't run.
"Come on, just tell me."
I'm not going to lie and say I ran it when I didn't.
"I would. You look like you could have run it. I'd say 'no' if you were like two-fifty, but you're not."
Dude, seriously, I didn't run the marathon.
So...anyobody know anyone who did run? I'm looking for an official number. I'll come in tomorrow and discreetly hang it up in my cubicle.
-t
Monday, April 14, 2008
Big Papi/Yankees: Clubhouse Curse
Punk construction worker buries a David Ortiz jersey in the floor of the visitor's clubhouse in the new Yankee Stadium.
David Ortiz is in the slump of his career, hitting 0.070, just one hit in his last 29 at bats.
Superstitious Yankees dig up the Ortiz jersey.
I posit, that the jersey did not, in fact, jinx the Yankees, but rather, jinxed our favorite home town slugger, Mr. David Ortiz, and THEREFORE when he re-enters the lineup he WILL TEAR IT UP.
So, please, a message to Sox fans who happen to be working construction, STOP TRYING TO JINX THE YANKEES. It's going to backfire. That's karma. Educate yourselves.
-t
David Ortiz is in the slump of his career, hitting 0.070, just one hit in his last 29 at bats.
Superstitious Yankees dig up the Ortiz jersey.
I posit, that the jersey did not, in fact, jinx the Yankees, but rather, jinxed our favorite home town slugger, Mr. David Ortiz, and THEREFORE when he re-enters the lineup he WILL TEAR IT UP.
So, please, a message to Sox fans who happen to be working construction, STOP TRYING TO JINX THE YANKEES. It's going to backfire. That's karma. Educate yourselves.
-t
22
One-Eyed Frank
Sam and I planned to atten a performance Saturday night at the Improv Asylum. Before we got there, though, we had to get there.
We had tickets for the eight o'clock show. The Red Sox played at 3:45PM. Plenty of time, I thought, even with the average Sox/Yanks game lasting 3.5 hours.
Around about the fourth inning it started raining outside the apartment, the rain headed into the city of Boston, no doubt, the torrent certain to cause a delay unless they wrapped up the next three innings in ten pitches or so (not going to happen with Youk, Drew, Pedroia, Manny...)(ok, with that lineup, it's not going to happen unless Lugo bats nine times in a row).
The rain holds off, until the eighth, just as they call Papelbon in for a four out save. Downpour - out comes the tarp.
We can't stay for the end of the game and still make the improv show, so we head to the train, and I call some people to make sure I get updates on the Fenway situation throughout the night.
As we arrive at the train station I calculate that we have exactly enough time to get on the train, ride to Haymarket, and pick up our tickets.
What I forgot to factor in was the shuttle bus running in place of the train on the Orange Line (every weekend from here to the end of time, it seems).
Luckily, for us, the herky-jerky bus trip didn't delay us overmuch, and the Improv show started nearer 8:05PM, so we had no trouble grabbing some drinks and finding our seats.
The show was hilarious.
-AND- they totally used one of my suggestions for a bit!
Ok, so the crowd was a bit...lackluster. The majority of folks were attached to a tame bachelorette party (who knew beforehand that the Improv players were going to call up the bride-to-be for an embarassing skit, which seemed to be the only part of the show they were really into), and there were also some elderly grandmother types (one who couldn't stop herself grooving to the hip-hop beat laid down by the DJ between sketches).
There was also a family celebrating their son's fourteenth birthday who gets nominated for "Line of the Night" with his response to the Improv actress asking why he hadn't been calling her: "Well, I've been kinda busy, it's tax time." The kid's quick on his feet.
Anyway, as they came back from intermission they called out to the audience to suggest a location that would fit on the stage. I yelled out (so as not to be drowned out by the non-existent participation from the rest of the audience) "Pirate ship!" and the MC turned and was all "YES! Your shit is totally on top of it tonight! Awesome!"
The skit highlighted a be-hooked unlucky-in-love pirate captain named One-Eyed Frank.
So that was pretty cool.
On thetrain bus home Samantha and I sat next to a drunk baseball fan. How'd we know he was a baseball fan? As he blearily eyed the passengers on the bus, he raised his fist in solidarity with an older woman in a Yankee warm-up jacket. "You're a Yankee fan?" he slurred, "We're outnumbered here."
He then went on to describe to the man sitting opposite that he had grown up next door to Manny Ramirez in New York, and Manny used to hang out with him as a kid. And play baseball with him. And...fell asleep.
Go Sox.
We had tickets for the eight o'clock show. The Red Sox played at 3:45PM. Plenty of time, I thought, even with the average Sox/Yanks game lasting 3.5 hours.
Around about the fourth inning it started raining outside the apartment, the rain headed into the city of Boston, no doubt, the torrent certain to cause a delay unless they wrapped up the next three innings in ten pitches or so (not going to happen with Youk, Drew, Pedroia, Manny...)(ok, with that lineup, it's not going to happen unless Lugo bats nine times in a row).
The rain holds off, until the eighth, just as they call Papelbon in for a four out save. Downpour - out comes the tarp.
We can't stay for the end of the game and still make the improv show, so we head to the train, and I call some people to make sure I get updates on the Fenway situation throughout the night.
As we arrive at the train station I calculate that we have exactly enough time to get on the train, ride to Haymarket, and pick up our tickets.
What I forgot to factor in was the shuttle bus running in place of the train on the Orange Line (every weekend from here to the end of time, it seems).
Luckily, for us, the herky-jerky bus trip didn't delay us overmuch, and the Improv show started nearer 8:05PM, so we had no trouble grabbing some drinks and finding our seats.
The show was hilarious.
-AND- they totally used one of my suggestions for a bit!
Ok, so the crowd was a bit...lackluster. The majority of folks were attached to a tame bachelorette party (who knew beforehand that the Improv players were going to call up the bride-to-be for an embarassing skit, which seemed to be the only part of the show they were really into), and there were also some elderly grandmother types (one who couldn't stop herself grooving to the hip-hop beat laid down by the DJ between sketches).
There was also a family celebrating their son's fourteenth birthday who gets nominated for "Line of the Night" with his response to the Improv actress asking why he hadn't been calling her: "Well, I've been kinda busy, it's tax time." The kid's quick on his feet.
Anyway, as they came back from intermission they called out to the audience to suggest a location that would fit on the stage. I yelled out (so as not to be drowned out by the non-existent participation from the rest of the audience) "Pirate ship!" and the MC turned and was all "YES! Your shit is totally on top of it tonight! Awesome!"
The skit highlighted a be-hooked unlucky-in-love pirate captain named One-Eyed Frank.
So that was pretty cool.
On the
He then went on to describe to the man sitting opposite that he had grown up next door to Manny Ramirez in New York, and Manny used to hang out with him as a kid. And play baseball with him. And...fell asleep.
Go Sox.
23
Friday, April 04, 2008
Great Way To Kill Time And Remind Yourself How Smart You Used To Be In College
How I've been spending my time:
How many elements can you name? (I logged a dismal 35 elements)
Check out the other links on the site, highlights include:
Name the countries in:
Name all the major leage baseball teams, US Presidents
and more!
Seriously, it's just a bit addicting, and I'm almost ashamed to admit I did better on Tom Hanks movies than I did naming the Presidents.
-t
How many elements can you name? (I logged a dismal 35 elements)
Check out the other links on the site, highlights include:
Name the countries in:
- Europe
- Asia
- Africa
- South America (I forgot two, and named an extra six that are actually in Central America)
Name all the major leage baseball teams, US Presidents
and more!
Seriously, it's just a bit addicting, and I'm almost ashamed to admit I did better on Tom Hanks movies than I did naming the Presidents.
-t
Monday, March 31, 2008
MLB Boston Red Sox 2008 Preview
2008 Red Sox Preview:
Offense:
Manny's the comeback kid this year, I expect above average HRs and RBIs this season, I expect the Sox pick up his option for next year, and he'll continue opening up to the media revealing, slowly but surely, that we really haven't been missing all that much.
Ortiz will recover nicely from the minor knee clean-up and will be the clutch hitter we've all come to expect. I dig the new longer hair and am putting the over-under on new beard styles at seven.
Pedroia and Ellsbury will start slow and level off at just over and just under.300 this year, respectively. We'll see 35 steals from Ellsbury and Lugo will be just behind him with 32.
More of the same from Youk, a sharp decline from Varitek (~.215), a decline in home run power from Lowell (though we'll still see the doubles and average).
Finally, the Moss, Crisp, and Drew platoon will be awkward for a month-and a half while Drew hovers near the Mendoza line, Crisp dips below it, and Francona can't justify defering to Drew's monster contract to keep Moss on the bench with a .310 average. After that we'll see Crisp released or traded for thirty cents on the dollar (couple-a minor leaguers, low draft pick or PTBNL) and Drew start to pick up that giant green f-ing wall in left field and turn into a double machine. Moss will be a good pinch-hitter off the bench and spell Ellsbury in center when needed.
Defense:
I'd like to start the 2008 Defensive Preview by stating that COCO CRISP WAS TOTALLY ROBBED OF THE GOLD GLOVE IN 2007! THEFT OF THE HIGHEST ORDER AND YOU VOTERS SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSEVES.
Ok, I predict that this year Youk will make some errors, Lowell will not boot 27 balls in the first two weeks of home games, Ellsbury will misjudge a few more fly balls in the triangle, Manny will still surprise runners with his arm (and national announcers with his high OF assist numbers), and Cash will be better than expected catching Wake.
Pitching
The Red Sox training staff should be commended for handling Beckett's back spasms as patiently and cautiously as they have. Slowing down the franchise pitcher's recovery can only help in the long run. We'll see him get roughed up in his first few starts (but I expect the big bats will be out in force and help kick-start his win total); we'll see him start to surge near the All-Star break, and finish strong through September.
Matsuzaka, though, will be another story. Until he stops nibbling and only throws what Varitek calls for, he's going to get hit all over the place. An ERA north of five isn't out of the question in the first half of the season. Expect quality starts and not much else. (Once he does start listening to Tek, though, he'll be absolutely lights out).
Buccholz has to work through rookie jitters. If he can lower expectations for himself, and just try for some quality starts I think we'll see him come into his own as the season progresses.
Colon is going to be the surprise pick-up of the season, the way he's been throwing the ball could see him get ten wins if he keeps a spot in the rotation (subbing for Buchholz early on, and Lester later).
And speaking of Lester, I fear the national media, and Boston sports radio, will continue to harp on his performance, expecting the next coming of Sandy Koufax, and lambasting him for being (just) a decent third or fourth starter. As always, if Lester can keep the ball in the zone he will be fine. He is his own worst enemy. (Though, you Sox fans may recall, when Lester was first called up for some spot starts he seemed to walk the bases loaded and then pitch brilliantly to get out of the jam. He was a left-handed Houdini with runners in scoring position. I therefore move that Francona calls for two intentional walks at the begining of every inning Lester's on the mound (or, to keep the pitch count down, intentional catcher's interference) and then we'll see some Cy Young caliber pitching!).
Wakefield will eat up innings and keep hitters guessing. I should go buy a Wakefield jersey.
Bullpen:
Papelbon will anchor a solid 'pen much like last year. We'll see more of Delcarmen in a set-up role, and Okajima will be used more as a specialist at the back end of the sixth and early seventh innings. I expect Brian Corey to make the roster, though I'd rather have Lopez, as I doubt he'd make it through waivers to Pawtucket. Timlin should be fine after his finger laceration recovers, and I'm sure the staff will watch him for signs of fatigue after the midpoint of the season.
Final numbers for the hurlers:
Beckett: 19-7 3.18
Matsuzaka: 16-13 4.80 (will lead the team in walks)
Lester: 15-14 4.40
Wakefield: 17-16 5.00
Buchholz: 12-6 3.33
Colon: 10-4 3.60
Papelbon: 2-2-33 1.70
Delcarmen: 3-1-5 2.00
Okajima: 3-0-2 2.50
Additional thoughts:
Colon will be the biggest (ha) story of the first half; Matsuzaka-mania will, again, control the media and merchandising; I expect good things from Moss, he's not too far away from an every-day position; Ellsbury's bat will heat up after an initial slump and his speed will continue to wow crowds; Papelbon will get progressively crazier off the mound (and stay just as scary on); Epstein will get shafted on the Crisp deal, because there isn't any way around it.
Standings:
I think Toronto's pitching could give us trouble, we've seen the Sox bat's go north and turn cold before, and Tampa will be trouble, Orioles will wind up dead last, and the Yankees, they are what they are, and I'm already sick of Steinbrenner the Second mouthing off.
| American League | Natinal League | |
|---|---|---|
| Angels win the West | Padres win the West | |
| Tigers win the Central | Cubs win the Central | |
| Sox win the East | Mets win the East | |
| Indians win the Wild Card | Phillies win the Wild Card* |
*I'd like to pick the Reds as a surprise Wild Card winner, but every single arm on Dusty Baker's pitching staff is going to fall off by September.
Leave your thoughts in the comments.
-t
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
"Play (Chemically Enhanced) Ball!"
Work softball is back!
We've just completed our first email thread of the season discussing potential new names for our squad.
I propsed "The Bearded Wonders" for us, especially funny because no one on the team wears a beard (though, in my case, it's certainly not for lack of trying). Others included "Team Great!" (exclamation point included), "Strange Brew" (the favorite, and "Pedroia's Ping Pong Posse" (too long).
My suggestsion came in third in the voting, but it was a close race (McCain-Huckabee close). Luckily, this year, our team name won't feature any puns on performance enhancing drugs (BALCO Lab Rats, The Linseed Oilers, Mo'PEDS).
Up next, deciding on a uniform color. We wore blue last year (our rallying cry was "Go blue team!") but this year I'm pulling for red.
Because it will look totally great with my beard.
-t
We've just completed our first email thread of the season discussing potential new names for our squad.
I propsed "The Bearded Wonders" for us, especially funny because no one on the team wears a beard (though, in my case, it's certainly not for lack of trying). Others included "Team Great!" (exclamation point included), "Strange Brew" (the favorite, and "Pedroia's Ping Pong Posse" (too long).
My suggestsion came in third in the voting, but it was a close race (McCain-Huckabee close). Luckily, this year, our team name won't feature any puns on performance enhancing drugs (BALCO Lab Rats, The Linseed Oilers, Mo'PEDS).
Up next, deciding on a uniform color. We wore blue last year (our rallying cry was "Go blue team!") but this year I'm pulling for red.
Because it will look totally great with my beard.
-t
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