Ariel vs. Bender

I think we can all agree that the awesomest classes of humanoids are ninjas, pirates, robots, and zombies. Age old questions, of course, follow these groups around the internet like rim shots after a bad joke. You may even be aware of the video game "Pirates vs. Ninjas Dodgeball"

So, I often ponder the very question, who would win in a fight?

But, I always seem to run into problems; One, the classic rock-paper-scissors circle, and, Two, the inclusivity problem.

The Inclusivity Problem can be phrased as a question: What if there is another category of awesome thing that can fight?

The primary example is, of course, aliens. Even restricting ourselves to simply humanoid aliens there are still an uncountable number to choose from (ALF, ET, the worm guys, Zim, Wookies, etc, etc) but each of them may possess some incredible power (Ben 10) useful in an offensive or defensive capacity.

And we could go on all day about aliens, but I am even more concerned with the rest of the categories. Who else are we forgetting?

Mutants? Mermaids? Playwrites? Cryptids? What sort of strange and magical battles could we be speculating on?

Consider, Shakespeare vs. Zombie; Yeti vs. Pirate; Robot vs. Mermaid (on land - in water?)

This is exactly why Celebrity Deathmatch should never have been taken off the air.

-t

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Office Ninja!

When I takeover the world all the mindless drones clerking my world headquarters will be getting their office supplies from this guy:


-t

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